Friday, 14 March 2008

Arrest this girl, her Hitler hair-do is making me feel ill.

So the topic on today's XFM show hosted by Alex Zane was Sex, and people who just aren't that into it. Now Alex occassionally gets on my nerves as a presenter, but on the whole I think he's very agreeable. I confess I do know him because he used to work at MTV and he kindly got me a few gigs when I first started doing stand-up......... So I don't have that weird hate thing for him that many stand-up's seem to have. (NB: Hatred = Jealousy - Ha! Life's tough ain't it. Gutted.)

Anyway the subject was sexual-ness. And he was saying that he just isn't that interested. And I was like, yeah me too! And then he described it as being good at first and then he just goes off it. And I'm like "YEAH! ME TOO!" And then he spoke to the fish man that he always speaks to from Billingsgate Market and the fish man said that this is because he hasn't found the ONE! And I'm like "YEAH! ME TOO!" So this is totally it then. I thought there was something wrong with me. What a relief. Next plan on the agenda is to find "the one." I have my eye on a couple of people I already know and I think there's a connection... OOH. What depicts a connection? I'm not sure, but my tummy goes funny when I see them. Maybe they make me sick. Who knows.

I'm considering stopping reading the news. Its so depressing. There seems to be a breed of animal type people (even though I love animals but ya know what I mean) who run around like complete savages beating and killing people for no reason. Like those two goths that got beat up for nothing in Lancashire and the girl died. MENTAL. What the fuck? How can a whole group of people all agree that doing that to someone is normal? Makes me feel sick.

The only piece of news that made me titter and even that was a bit horrid was these four guys in Eton who mugged a girl for her handbag. They call themselves "The Posse'". HAA HAA. Pussys more like. ... Imagine their fighting talk:
Posse' member: "One must hand that bag over immediately madame, or one will be forced to snatch it from your possession with brute force."
"VICTIM": "Crikey."
What do they need money for anyway?

This diet is rubbish - I'm hungry all the time. SUX DOGS DIX.

The voice over went ok in the end. Although along with the english paragraph I had to say, I made the three flemmish words sound a bit German. Oh well.

This weekend I will mainly be working and trying not to trough. I'm going out tonight and I will beg myself not to succumb to Pork scratchings and/or a Whoppa but it won't be easy. Saturday and Sunday I'll be ok as I'm working, but monday its St. Patrick's day and I'm meeting one of my friends for dinner and drinks in Greenwich. Why have I no more will power? Well I suppose I do have willpower cause I'm still not smoking and I fully believe this is it for me. I am on day 22 and I feel really great. However, I haven't hacked up much of the black stuff so I'm thinking maybe its just hanging out in my lungs....

Have a great weekend.

1 comment:

Nick said...

I like the way the titles of your blogs are from songs and trying to work out which songs they're from. It's like a quiz.

This one is easy (karma police) and so was Unintended. I am such a nerd.