Monday 23 February 2009

And you said something, you said something stupid like, love steals us from loneliness....

Well that was a good weekend! YAY.

Friday afternoon I had a dinner booked with my girlfriends at a restaurant near me. Louisa said that she went there when she "flat-sat" for me when I was in Australia. Apparently you need an introduction to the owner before you can book a table and when you're in there they LOCK the door! I love stuff like that. It was GREAT and the food was amazing as was the company. Claire had a great story about the worst date she's ever been on. HAHA. I'd love to write a book on these disaster dates I hear about, I could add a few of my own. Anyway I made friends with the owner and he gave me his card, so I am now IN! Yeah!

Saturday morning I woke up with a headache cause I've been off the booze lately so it seems to effect me alot more now when I drink. Still, I'd planned to go for a walk with my neighbour/friend Katy and walk we would do. What a beautiful day it was Saturday! We went up to the Observatory in Greenwich and I saw a doggie on a skateboard. How cool is that! Katy mentioned to me about one of her mates who is going through a really tough time at the moment having just been finished with by her man. We talked at length about this, because this person is really really low at the moment. All of her plans are out the window and she feels like she has to start again and that's a really scary prospect. I remember it well. But Katy and I were saying, if only we could pass on to her how WE feel at the moment. Its honestly, honestly ok to be alone you know and even though she can't imagine it now, there's a way out back to feeling good. Aw heart-break sucks massively eh.

Later on Saturday afternoon I met Evie, her boyf (Matt) and their pal Brooke. I felt a bit nervous cause it was a bit of a set-up really but we got on well and he's all Canadian and funny. We had loads of fun, but I was supposed to leave at a reasonable hour but the wine made me stay. Stoopid wine. But also THANKS wine. YAY. Anyway, I ended up getting home at silly-oclock and nearly had one of my SPECIAL hangovers the next day. I dragged myself to the radio station (thats dedication for you eh?) and cobbled together a reasonable show. I did mess up a few links though, next saturday there will be no drinking so next Sunday sees me speaking sentences that actually make sense.

Sunday arvo was sofa time. Me and my sofa are in love.

BYE.

Thursday 19 February 2009

I still need you but, I don't want you now.

I forgot to mention Valentines day this weekend just gone, in my last blog. Last year I was all lonesome so was like, Valentine's Day this, Valentine's Day that... This year was not the same. Sure in the back of my mind I secretly hoped for a bunch of flowers or a shredder ( I really need one). But then I thought, well no-one knows my address so how can they surprise me with a bunch of flowers? (or a shredder)

Also, ALSO, as I went about my business on Saturday I noticed lots of red faced males walking around carrying bulbous balloons saying "I LOVE YOU!" on them. Also some men had one lone red rose (tight arses) they seemed to have red faces too (good). And I just thought, this is so contrived. I know I'm not the first person to say that but this year it seemed even more so than usual. I used to do a bit in my stand-up about Valentine's day. It referred to going out for the Valentine's day SET menu. Sat uncomfortably close to other couples who are pretty much being told to love each other. And they probably should have an obligatory fuck when they get home as well. (the joke was, when I go home I can choose to have a wank. OH HAR HAR HAR, HEE HEE HEE. oh....that's not funny.)

So when I've been in that position in restaurants with past beau's I couldn't help but look around at the couples squashed in near me and think God, this is so embarrassing.

The next day (sunday) on my way to the radio station I saw a massive bunch of flowers poking out the top of a tip. What a waste. Luckily a nearby tramp came and got them out when I went past, hopefully to give them a good home. What? Oh.

I've just been tagged in a load of wedding photos from January and I look like a right heffer in them, its really motivated me to get down the gym today. What a chore though.

I watched the Brits last night ALL THE WAY THROUGH. I never do that but I'm doing a big staying in thing recently to try to save money (save money = I'm SKINT). I thought James Corden and the other one were most un-agreeable. Spesh the other one. Whats his name? Gavin. Gavin out of Gavin and Stacey. Anyway this Gavin made me cringe lots. It was so weird and they're jokes were embarrassing. And why did Gavin get to present it anyway? All he knows how to do is read scripts - thats not the same as writing them. What about nice Ruth? (lady who writes Gavin and Stacey with James). Anyway - I liked Girls Aloud's performance and Kings of Leon and also Take That's although their miming was silly. Also, I fancy Brandon Flowers now.

So anyway, that's that. I should go to the gym now. COME ON LEANNE. Must...move...from .....my....desk.

BAH.

Tuesday 17 February 2009

There is a green hill faraway, I'm going back there one fine day.

So I've downloaded Samantha Fox's classic "Touch Me". I'll play it sunday at SW1 for you so never fear. Its GREAT. The other day my friend MADE me join a dating site cause she wasc joining. When I went to fill in the info on me, it said, what was my favourite music and I just couldn't think of what to write. If I put at the moment its Samantha Fox's classic "touch me" - I don't think I'll get much interest. But do I really want them? I'm a bit over the internet dating thing - I'm sucha trend setter arent I! There was you single types laughing at me for signing up for three months, back in 2005 and now look, you're all at it. But yeah, its such a chore. I can't help but write on my profile (bit about me section) what I DON'T want in a guy.... I've met a few now and am sure of THAT, at the very least. Also, I'm quite liking the whole hanging out just me and my fish and my mates and going for long walks and doing exploring and stuff.

Saturday I was supposed to do a run in Battersea park but (and I do have an excuse)after leaving camden Friday night my mate Mark accidentally kept my purse with him. So I was in a cab and got a phone call to say I didn't have my purse when I was at New Cross (nearly home). So I called the controller of the cab company to tell them I had no money and the nasty man said they'd take me to the POLICE STATION. Horrid! Luckily the cab man was nice and said he'd come and get it off me on Monday. Consequently the next morning I went back to Camden to get my purse from Mark. SO I couldn't do the run without money - what happens if I wanted a burger on the way round....

Saturday afternoon myself and Lauren went to visit my pal Sophie who has a tiny baby. He was very sweet but did do sicking quite a bit. I'm not really immune to that like most Lady's, so munching on my Millie's Cookie was quite hard as well as seeing SICK in the background. Sophie is a great great mummy and she's so happy which is ace.

Sunday I did the radio show at SW1 radio and then went to Time 106.8 to do my afternoon slot. Since doing this, I have decided to quit at Time 106.8. I've thought long and hard about it, but basically I found it incredibly boring and robotic and also "Tease me", by "Chaka Demas and Pliers" quite frankly gives me a watery mouth (like Sophie's baby). I know that it could be an opportunity for me, but the station said they had no budget to pay me which I felt was insulting so have since called them up and told them that I will not be back.

I'm getting very excited about Catface Comedy on the 11th March - we've sold 28 tickets so far and there's still 3 weeks to go. I think its because there are going to be erotic dancers there. Erotica Rules!

BYE.

Monday 9 February 2009

You've been looking for someone you believe in....to love you, until your eyes run dry.

A very productive week if I do say so!

Last week was spent having many a night in so I was able to actually eat what I'd bought from Tesco online stead of chucking it away at the end of the week.

Saturday I woke up early and went for a long walk around Greenwich Park and to the Observatory. It was meant to be half jogged in preparation for my 5km run in Battersea Park on Saturday. Unfortunately when I started jogging on leaving my block, I had to stop because I hurt and was wheezing in an unattractive fashion. I decided on a nice stroll instead. I saw people doing Military training in the park and I thought, I'd quite like to do that. So I watched them for a bit from the sidelines and then felt like a weirdo and shuffled off. I've looked it up on the Internet since though and I think I might join in with it! My fitness levels are just stupid, I dunno how I'm gonna get through next Saturday morning.

After this I went to see my Nan in the Home. She was much the same - but does seem pretty calm. There's a lady in the home called Barbara who seems totally totally normal (the home is for people with Alzheimer's and senile dementia) and this Babara can have a completely normal conversation with you and you start to think - how comes she's in here? Then we'll have a conversation like this:
Barbara - "I'm going to Shooters Hill later"
Me - "Are you? I live near there."
Barbara - "Oh really? I OWN Shooters Hill..."
Then it begins to come clear as to why she's in there. She also thinks she owns the home as well and says she will sue anyone who touches anything. I saw her smack another lady for touching the TV. We had to intercept this of course and break it up. Its a shame because most of the other patients there either don't speak at all, or just shout occasionally or like my nan, can no longer reall remember english and just speaks German. This woman seems so together just very very confused. Ah well, was very nice to see Nannie Diggins again.

Saturday evening I went to the Cinema with Karen to see "He's just not THAT into you". Well. What can I say? Not much. Yes I can - it made women out to be desperate losers. Also didn't tell me anything I didn't already know about certain men. In conclusion, a light and fluffy film but would recommend as DVD viewage only.

Sunday I did SW1 radio which was a really enjoyable show. The talking point was centred around discoveries on Facebook. This was on the back of the story out this week in the papers about a woman who discovered that her husband was divorcing her because he set his status to SINGLE on facebook. What a cock.

The emails came in thick and fast with people disclosing negative discoveries about Facebook. My personal most recent negative discovery was this.....I liked a guy on Facebook who I thought was eligible for some loving, but after examining his status updates in detail, discovered that he had met someone and was now jolly happy which of course meant he's now off limits! That wasn't very nice to learn I can tell you! Still -thats better than someone else who emailed in to say that her boyfriend had dumped her and not given her a reason. Then three months later she checked his facebook page (come on, we've all been there)and on his wall he was getting congrats messages about him and his partner expecting a BABY! Bloody hell! Ah so THAT was the reason he dumped her. Good old facebook - one day your friend, the next your enemy.

And finally, its Valentine's Day on saturday and I'm actually quite looking forward to it. Saturday morning I have a run to do and then in the arvo am going to see my friend Sophie and her babba. I don't feel the urge to go out and rampage around London in the hope of bagging the leftover men, (like I have on so many other Valentine Days). Infact the one good thing about the film "He's just not that into you" was that I feel great about being a single gal about town. That's not to say that Valentine Cards would not be welcome, because of course, they would. So get sending.

Tuesday 3 February 2009

I'm searching for the rights, that I've got in my mind.

Yeah so I was thinking....I was thinking about you know that thing where one day you're on top of the world and then the next, you can feel so low, so very low. But when you're feeling low you don't believe that it will ever pass but it always does. Always, always. Like on Saturday I felt quite gloomy for no real reason. I went to see my sister and my neff, Alex. I really really tried to get him to Miow - he's not talking yet but making sounds as if he wished he could. I was absolutely sure I would make him do it, but after Miowing loudly in his face for about 7 minutes he just looked at me like I was a mental case. He really is the sweetest thing though - he's toddling about and he even had a little dance with me. Cheered me up it did. But what really cheered me up was dinner with my sister. We went out for a Chinese dinner and although we both felt a bit gloomy at first, we soon discussed something so very funny (I can't put it on here, as I know there are spies) that my entire face and head felt bruised with laughter. I needed that I did.

Anyway I've gone off track, all I'm saying is because I feel OK at the moment I've been reflecting on when I feel SO SO happy and also when I feel SO SO shit. And the thing is, it wears me out a bit. If I could just remember this feeling I have now, this feeling of being OK, then no matter if I'm happy or sad it will always pass and turn into something else....and then will probably come back again, because life's a bit like that. Ya know, relentless.
Erm...I had a point when I started writing this.

After the meal I went into Town to meet Hevver Bevver for drinks in Tottenham Court Road. I wasn't really looking forward to it if I'm honest as I didn't think I'd know anyone. BUT turns out I did know people and one of them was a BOY. I waved at him from across the bar and he waved back. The thing is I couldn't remember his name but then I did, it was JOHN! So I went over (after a couple of wines) to him and his fair lady and was like "John this, John that.." Until it turned out that his name wasn't John at all, it was Rob and the reason I thought he was called John was cause he had a mate called John who for some reason had stuck in my mind.

The lady with him wasn't his fair lady either. It also materialised that I'd been set up with this guy Rob once before but had completely forgotten about it and when I'd recognised him 'cross the bar, I'd actually just remembered him from the "setting-up" incident. How I laughed. Its all such a blur to me though... I must admit, it was at a time when I'd just met my then boyfriend and had been seeing him for about 2-3 weeks but had started to go off him. HAHA. Should have gone with my instincts. ARF! Anyhoo we had a fun night whilst Rob helpfully pieced together my memory. Happy days.

Sunday was radio day, went ok. Tried to inject some personality into my afternoon show but ended up conveying this by chucking in a few silly voices. Oh well. I did get some texts into the studio and also, one of my mates said he listened on his wireless and said I sounded HOT. YAY. I've a meeting with the manager tomorrow so will get some more feedback then I spose. I didn't do SW1 radio sunday morning but I'm definitely back in this Sunday so get ready to listen! www.sw1radio.co.uk and click listen now from 10am - 12pm.

And finally as all know WE HAS SNOW! Yesterday I had to get a cab into work (on account obviously) but left fairly early so managed to make a snow man. Luckily my neighbour Katy was in so I called her as I got back to the complex and she was like YAYAYAYAY! SNOW MAN!! Before that incident I'd been tramping about in the snow outside my flat examining my foot prints (doing big strides & little strides etc) when I suddenly looked up to see a hunky man laughing at me and shaking his head. I did a massive cherry and gambled off towards my flat. Silly snow, made me look a nob.

Here is our snowman.
Exhibit A.