Monday, 24 November 2008

Dancing....with tears in my eyes.

SOOOO! I know I haven't written, but why would I? I'm in Australia of course and am busy being happy.
Here's a brief update on the latest goings on for those who are interested. Last I wrote I was travelling to Sydney to do some Opera house looking and habour bridge gazing. We stayed at a hostel called "Wake up" and how um....kookie it was. Downstairs from the Wake Up place was a pumping disco called "side bar" and in it was a bar and a DJ and LOTS of students doing the good thing. So we joined in by power of sambucas and beer. Then I met a boy who wasn't 17! That is, I met a boy who was drunk and 28 (i think)! And he liked me at the time! YAY. So happy days dancing and staggering and laughing we had until 7am. The night consisted of us going to a casino at about 4am and then somehow I got us chucked out but I'm still yet to know why. I think it was because we was drinking not gambling. But who knows? Not me. Then we went down to a harbour (think it was Darling) and were rolling around on the floor (clothed) whilst commuters pretty much stepped over us. Oh Irish man, we'll always have Darling Harbour. See you on Facebook. Happy days!

Anyway, then the next day (and only full day in Sydney) I couldn't move at all. So I had Macdonalds and went back to bed. Then it was the next day and that day I COULD move so I tramped the streets for a bit and met my friend Abby for some lunch! She tried to convince me to move to Sydney and she almost did you know.

Next stop, Byron Bay and this place I fell in love with. Completely and utterly. I will have to write about this later on though cause its tooo long.

Today though, I went to Steve Irwin's zoo. Now for those who know me, they'll realise that I was devastated on hearing his passing. Today was a little tough if I'm honest, as soon as I walked through the gates, tears were in my eyes, yet I was happy to be stepping where he stepped. I know this might sound stupid to some, but to me it does not. At this Zoo I saw Agro the croc and I cuddled a Kangaroo, not sure if he liked it.

Tomorrow we're off to Fraser Island for a couple o nights. This island is riddled with Dingo's and apparently if you are attacked by one you're to fight aggressively. And not run away. Shit.

Will write proper soon.

Monday, 17 November 2008

I said to the man are you trying to tempt me?

Oh my GOD, I actually love it here. I'm trying to work out how I can live here for about a year or maybe six months. Lauren helpfully pointed out, I have no ties back home...(she means I haven't got a boyfriend). I tactfully mentioned I have a mortgage, a job and family and friends (in no particular order).... So how can I do it? I need to get a trade so I can bring something to the table of Oz.

Anyway, as you can prolly tell I really am loving it here. Today we flew into Sydney and have just had a marvellous dinner down at the harbour overlooking the bridge and the Opera house.
The thing about Australia is everyones so laid back and friendly and the things I've been getting my knickers in a twist back home seem so insignificant now. It's like Who Cares? Stuff thats kept me tossing and turning all night worrying my arse off has just become so minor now. It really is a wonderful feeling, I feel free.

Have I mentioned the men here that are hunks of spunks? They are blooming gorgeous and I canna work out if its just cause they've got tans and are all muscly and tall or whether they're..... Fuck man they're gorgeous.

The other night me and a girl I met out here called Leanne (good name) went out dancing in Adlelaide to a place called The Elephant or something.

Anyway, there was a live band there called "Pash" (HAHAHAHA) and they played all the classics, like "500 Miles" by the Proclaimers. But as the night went on, much like in the UK the crowd became more raucous. And with more beer came more beer being spilt over Leanne (2) and me laughing lots. Also someone kept doing the most evil farts ever. Every now and then either Leanne or me would have this look on our faces of disgust as the stench wafted up our noses until it came to a point where she did the "stink face" again and I'd just swallowed a swig of Gin and Tonic and her face made me crack up laughing, and I accidently sprayed Leanne with spit and gin in her face. How we (I) laughed. After this place became just ridiculous we moved onto an irish pub on East Terrace where there was another, cooler band. They were doing a cover by the Killers when all of a sudden an old man from the audience went up on the stage with them and started to tootle along on his descant recorder. We thought he was part of the band until a burly bouncer went up and dragged him off the stage exclaiming "if you get up on stage again, your out". What the fuck? Ah poor man, he just wanted to join in. We laughed at that too though.

Oh its simply grand here. I heard someone shout "rack off" the other day and he meant it. Life doesn't get much better than this folks, it really doesn't.

Friday, 14 November 2008

Beautiful girl, stay with me.

So here I am, on the other side of the world having an excellent time. I have loads to report back on but only have limited internet time so will give you a brief run down for now and write proper tomorrow.

  • Kangaroos are soft and furry, I should know, I touched one. That's right.
  • Wallabees look like tiny scamping joeys.
  • The Australian folk are very friendly and welcoming.
  • All the men are hunks of spunk. Which sounds disgusting but is actually amazing.
  • When I had a steak the menu described the preparation as "once the cow's horns are chopped off and its arse is wiped, its ready to serve" and it didn't even put me off.
  • Wine tasting tours mean drinking alot and making friends with all on tour.
  • The men out here are hunks of spunks.
  • The Great Ocean Road is loooong but the waves are massive and I did splashing without a care in the world for sharks.
  • There are too many flies.
  • The australian verion of "This Morning" is better than our version. Seriously.
  • Singapore is HOT.
  • All the hostels smell the same.
  • My feet are raw from burnage.
  • I had reflexology and it hurt.
  • Koalas are well moody.

More detail tomorrow. BYE! You're all asleep now and I'm typing! hahah! I'm typing and you're all asleep. If you're in England, you're all asleep.

Monday, 3 November 2008

Come on baby, don't fear the reaper......... baby take my hand.

I'm going to Australia on Friday! That's FOUR days away. FOUR! I know. I'm very excited but also a little scared, but also a little excited, and also a little scared. I'm not going to be contactable AT ALL. No mobile, no crapberry no nuffink. YAY.
I'm getting a bit concerned about the length of the flight in case I develop deep vein thrombosis. I have my sexy stockings that should compress those deep veins away and I plan to do lots of padding up and down the plane though and also consumption of water, not wine, water.

In other news it was of course Halloween this weekend and I went to two parties. I don't know why, but dressing up in scary costumes makes me feel a bit sick. Thus I decided to go as an EMO to friday's party (Newt from Hollyoaks) and I put on a hat on Saturday night for the party in my local bar. I think that's plenty sufficient.

Halloween's a chance for people to dress up in Scream masks and look like mentalists. Don't like it. Anyway I met this guy from the complex I live on and was telling him that my building isn't allowed to use the onsite gym. He was UTTERLY appalled and kept coming up to me and my friend to express his disgust. In the end we started to get a bit like "yeah, can you go away now please?" and so he gets the hint and goes to walk away and says "Ok but I'll just say one more thing girls, you need to get down that gym".
So then we did grooving about on the dance floor and these three lads came over and were like "Don't worry, we're GAY!" (Really? I'd never have guessed except that your friend's wearing a gold studded T-shirt spelling the words "Drama Queen.")

God, is this all there is? There must be more to life.

I keep dreaming about this man and its making me obsessional. I actually want to marry him and firmly believe I must be in love. If not, why do I have to keep dreaming of him? They aren't rude dreams, just ones where we love each other. Just like the dreams where you are best friends with a celebrity like Dawn French or something. Now my love dreams have made me realise that I must love him.

Either that or I need a holiday. To Australia. I wish I were Gabrielle from the 90's cause then all would be well.

Bloody cold weather. My nose keeps doing that thing where it runs and by the time I've realised it, I've had three conversations with people completely not knowing I have candlestick nose(s). And they totally do know, and are probably cringing and thinking "just fucking wipe it".

Just did another voiceover at work for MTV2. I like doing voiceovers. I did the voice of Jack out the Whitestripes with his sister-wife Meg. I'm so versatile.

Nothing more to report. Nothing.

K Bye.