Thursday 18 November 2010

I closed my eyes and closed myself and closed my world and never opened up to anything that could get me at all...

So once more Christmas is right around the corner with just 5 weeks left to go. SIGH. No, I'm looking forward to it very much. Even though I can't put my Xmas Tree up owing to my rabbit eating it. He eats everything. And he shits everywhere. And recently he's been spraying piss on me if he gets annoyed. In fact, I live in a litter tray. I'm hoping that when he gets his balls lopped off all will be right with the world, but somehow I think he's just a naughty ware-rabbit sent to cause me grief. I can't be angry with him for long though because he's such a Catface with his snuffly fuzzy nosey and his velveteen rabbit ears.

Oh yes the last time I wrote I was about to go to a Supper Club in Islington. It was really good fun although slightly cringey. We arrived there late so I felt unbonded with the others. I also couldn't be bothered to talk to randoms but quickly realised that this was the thing to do so I chatted to a nice girl called.....I can't remember....but anyway she was nice. Then we all went out to this shed in the garden and proceeded to trough through copious lovely food.

There was only one semi-dickhead there. He was quite posh and about 27 years old but felt he knew more than me. Mistake. No not really, he just had an opinion on everything and kept spouting a lot of bilge. All like this: "HAW HAW HAW! FNAR FNAR FNAR!" Luckily for him I had been very good with my wine consumption so he didn't receive a Leanne special. Like when he said he hadn't come across ANY crime in London nor had his posho friends - he then when onto to say that crime was only between gangs and drug users. Yes, that's right Knob for brains, that's the facts indeed. Another one from the home counties who gets cabs everywhere.

He reminded me of that dick off the Apprentice from last night's episode. What was his name? I can't remember but he had a face like a pig was about 20 and was team leader. I'm an entrepreneur, I make decisions in my head, that's why I'm good at business. Oh shut up dick wad, why don't you eat your own shit? That would have been my idea in the brain storming session. "Yes, I have an idea pig face, why don't you eat your own shit." Then I would draw a picture on the flip chart of his pig face eating his own shit.

As you can see I am still a huge fan of the HD blue eyed candidates on The Apprentice but my love will always remain with Lord Sugar.

In other news Prince William liked her so he went and put a ring on it. (Kate) And now she'll be a Princess and everything! They've only a few months to plan - not long at all. The guys at my work are doing a whip round for them, they deserve it. And Kate's got the Diana -engagement ring which I quite like, but lets hope she won't have to recycle that bloody awful dress. (Let alone the ruffs.)

So Facebook! How am I coping not being a part of that magical world I hear you ask...? Very well thank you. I must admit in the first couple of days I was itching to know what *Jo was having for her tea and also that "*Annette has had e (FUCKING) nuff!" and also my absolute favourite - the obligatory "whats up hun?" comment below the above update... But I have coped. And it's been lovely and refreshing and although I was only going to come off for a month, a month has passed and I just don't want back in. Maybe next year. We'll see.
I do miss some people though. But luckily I have their mobile numbers so don't be alarmed.
*Some names have been changed in order to not make people I know look like dicks.

And that's that. I think. Yes, anyway, all that I care to divulge on here.

I hope you are really well.
Until next time...