SO. I'm back from Majorca and currently in Edinburgh.
Majorca was good, very hot and not as smelly as I remember. The last time I went there I was 18 and went to a foam party at BCM (which is a club FYI old folk). On the foam party pictures all the girls were wearing just bra's and mini skirts so me and my friends did the same. What knobs we were. Anyway, at the party there was a porno playing on the big screen and once the foam began to spew out I felt myself being groped muchly by random blokes. It was vile. Anyway (and I hate people that say this) I digress. GOD. Anyway, it was good this time round but I did chuckle when I saw a massive advert in the sky (it was attached to an aeroplane) advertising BCM's Foam Party. Yuck.
I spent much of this holiday on my own and although that was fine in the day, by night when I would eat in a restaurant I noticed lots of women with their families glaring at me. Don't worry love, your fat, ugly husband is quite safe.
I arrived in Edinburgh yesterday and met Caroline Mabey who I'm staying with. She lives with Michael Legge and Johnny Candon and its cool. Caroline and I started drinking quite early on yesterday and then headed out on the razz. We met Gina Lyons and all proceeded to get drunk. Good.
Then Gina went to watch a gig and Caroline headed off to do a gig so Johnny Candon picked up where they left off as my drinking partner. I decided to spill my red wine down myself which stained my denim skirt a treat. Phew. Then Michael Legge turned up and we went to the Loft bar (Johnny went home). Michael said today that I kept calling Johnny a 'Lord" so this may have contributed to his departure. By now I was very drunk indeed and being a big dick. Then, I saw a guy I used to know quite well and proceeded to try and chat him up. He loved it, no sorry, not loved it, hated it. Then Caroline came (sorry dear reader if this seems patchy but this is how I remember it, like a dream) and met me and I drank some more and tried to make Michael drink a shot as it was his birthday (by then it was). And then Michael went somewhere else and then Caroline said it was time to go and asked me if it was wise to drink anymore to which I replied (I'm told) "its ok, it's only vodka, lime and soda" Then paused for a minute and went "Oh yeah, vodka's alcohol isn't it..." and I was completely serious.
This morning I woke up feeling EVIL. My heartbeat was beating in my eyes and I couldn't stop cringing. Luckily Johnny woke up and talked me through my guilt. The thing with me is, when I'm very very drunk I talk absolute shit. Constantly. And I chat up people I would NEVER FANCY sober and I JUST KNOW they now think I secretly fancy them and I so, so don't. Whenever I come to Edinburgh I always act like a total dick splat, so I'm very pleased that this year I've remained consistent. Oh well. It's Michael's birthday today so I think they're having drinks in Brookes Bar and I am limiting my intake to TWO drinks of alcohol and NO shots. And now I've written this, this wont be the case. (but now I've written that, maybe it will)
I saw a good show today featuring Catie Wilkins, Lou Sanders and Hannah George. It were ace. Go see. It's on at Espionage at 3:30pm. I love Catie and Lou, they're wicked girls and I met Hannah for the first time and she seemed lovely too. And they're ALL funny so get involved.
I'm off home tomorrow and then going to Somerset. And then, I'm afraid it's job search massive. I can't be unemployed any longer it's too uncomfortable. I'm going to sign-on as well. I have no idea how to do this and the experience should be interesting. *sigh*
Will update with more Edinburgh tales tomorrow.