Oh God this is relentless. Where are all the jobs? Stop saying, WE'RE in a recession, you're not and I bloody am. Oh well. I got a day's temping yesterday in Halstead which has a population of like ONE. It was a good day however and I got right into the swing of things. My boy's housemate has his own business and he needed someone to come in and progress the orders. Which means ringing people up and saying, "erm where's our order?? You promised you'd send it and you LIED. Where is it? I feel so violated." Well, not like that, but a bit like that. And I had to do answering of the phones too. Reminded me of TV Travel shop. "Good afternoon, TV Travel shop how can I help you?" Or as we hilariously liked to drop in... "How can I hump you?" Oh happy days. etc. (Obviously I didn't say that yesterday.) Just as well they weren't flying Airlingus.... "Yes Mrs Jones you'll be flying (cunni)LINGUS." What? I said Airlingus.... what did you think I said?" Oh we were tinkers in our hay day. What does hay day mean? I mean,where does it come from? My hay day. When I was made entirely out of HAY. Yes those were the days.
Last week I went to to MTV Belgium to record the voiceover for the TMF Awards. The day started off very silly. I woke up at 4:30am on my sofa fully clothed and had to get straight in the shower and off to the station. EVERYTHING was delayed, trains, the computer governed DLR and the tube. I arrived 5 minutes before the train was due to depart and as the eurostar is like an aeroplane that travels on land and under the sea I was too late. I then had to sit around for an hour and a half waiting for the next one.
When I finally boarded it, none other than BO JO (Boris Johnson) was on board too. When we arrived in Brussels the PAPs were out in force to greet BO JO and co. I had to get on another train to a distant town and I missed that so more waiting around. Luckily when I did get on the train there was a very sweet tiny puppy on board to keep me company. When I got to Belgium my ex colleagues Hanna and Petra were waiting for me. Lovely girls. Anyway we pretty much got straight down to the Voiceover. One of the descriptions of the script was to say the text in a "Bombastic" way. I tried my best to be like Shaggy but to no avail. It went remarkably well and we completed it in record time. I managed to get back for around 10:30pm and my boyf came over. He'd bought me this big plant/flower thing. And I didn't realise but it was a massive Orchid which requires love and attention. I will do my very very best.
At the weekend I was back on SW1 radio, so please make sure you listen this sunday 10am - 12pm. http://www.sw1radio.co.uk/ is the website to log onto and click LISTEN LIVE. And I will play you a songy! After this I met up with the boy and we went to a "Heavy Horse Show" in Shoreham, Kent. There were indeed very heavy horses there, possibly weighing about 100 stone each. Who knows? I was disappointed that their weights weren't disclosed. Also there was TOMBOLA and a birds of prey exhibition, and a smash the plates thing and everything. It was was not unlike a real life Vicar of Dibly. Strange but much fun.
This week's flown by and next week I really have to knuckle down as the teachers say. But oh I'm having so much fun being out of work. In two weeks its my birthday and I shall be 31 years of age. What about when people say "I'm 31 years YOUNG!" Oh hooo har har har! So very amusing. Yes anyway so I'll be 31. The year's flown by and I just called my mum up to check what day I'll be seeing her in my birthday week. I was going to let her know that on my actual birthday the boy's taking me out and on the friday I have a big knees up of birthday drinks. She goes, oh that's good as I'm out on your actual birthday but I presumed you wouldn't wanna see us that day anyway. I was like "Why did you presume that?" and she goes "Well you never see us on your birthday do you." Erm except LAST year mum. She was like" Yeah but last year was a bit of a funny one." "Do you mean because I was 30 mum?" And she goes "Well no, it was cause you were all on your own weren't you" ERM NO. I wasn't. I just didn't have a boyfriend.... like most year's. hahah. She makes me laugh. So yes, I'm very much looking forward to that. YAY 31. PRESSURE.
"What have you done with your life Leanne?"
"Alot thanks, inner monologue. "
"Oh, OK then, as you were."
Until next time.